java_fiend | Ye Olde Purge Bucket

Good Morning and Good Saturday, Good People! Did you all manage to survive the madness that is the 4th? Did you blow off any bodily bits? Or did you manage to survive whole and intact?

I don't know about y'all, but this was just a strange, disjointed kinda week. I never really felt like I got on track or stayed focused on anything. Then again, that seems to be the norm lately.

Words. I don't haz them. Another week with just about nothing substantial put down. This week, we have two entries for Idol due and nothing is working for me. I tried to get my piece down last night for a joint piece with

pixie117 that we'd talked about and I kid you not, I started and re-started that piece more than a dozen times last night. I'd get a few paragraphs in and it just stalled out. It just didn't work. Like at all. I'm just lucky we use computers instead of paper these days otherwise the crumpled up pile of crap by my desk would have filled my room and probably would have been responsible for the death of dozens of trees. I tried doing some freewriting and it basically amounted to a long string of profanities.

But the issue is way bigger than just Idol for me. Not having words or the ability to string together coherent sentences into anything resembling a decent story is a big, big problem for me. What I turned out for Idol last week was luck. I just hammered on the keyboard and hoped for the best. I know that my style tends to be a little sparse, dark and gritty but I think that may have been about the darkest, most violent piece I've ever written. I haven't really stepped back yet to dissect it and see what it was all about. Perhaps I'm better off not doing that come to think of it.

But the bottom line is that my head is a very noisy place lately. Like super noisy. And I find that I'm struggling mightily to turn down the volume, to ignore the babble of voices and focus on my work. Actually, struggling might not be the best word... finding it impossible lately is probably more accurate. I'm seriously stuck on a creative Sahara and need to find my way out. Pronto.

Which is a big problem. I need to find a way to quiet the crowd in my head to allow me to work or it will be a bigger problem.

I'm not sure what I'm going to do about Idol just yet... my hope is that I can focus enough to bang out the two pieces I need. After that, I really need to figure out how to turn the noise off and have a really productive week next week. It's getting more frustrating and worrisome as the days go by without any sort of movement or productivity. Ugh.

So anyway... on that cheery note...

How are you all doing? How has the Universe been treating you? Has it been kind and generous? Do your cups overfloweth? Or are they dry and dusty? Have you had a good week? A bad week? An in-between week? What were the highlights and the lowlights of your week, my friends? What is the haps with you?

As always, this here is your playground. Need to stand up and shout? Need to climb up on your soapbox and rail about something? Need to stand upon the mountaintop and scream your lungs out? Need some words of advice, encouragement or support? Need a virtual hug? Need to virtually punch somebody in the nose? Anything and everything is welcome and encouraged here. The spotlight is yours, step on up, grab the microphone and belt it out.

Once again, the Purge Bucket is open for your convenience... spew forth, my friends.

ETA: Since I didn't manage to get my Saturday Playlist post up earlier... what in the hell are you all listening to today? Bonus points for linking/embedding your musical selections in the comments!!!